The statistics around cheating in relationships are quite frankly shocking. If you didn’t know, around 60% of people will cheat on their partner and that’s only when looking at married couples. It’s one of the hardest things to go through, and if you have been cheated on, it’s common to find your confidence at rock bottom through no fault of your own. Here are five things to try if you’re aiming to restore confidence as a result of an unfaithful partner.
Acceptance and Reframing
Despite doing nothing wrong, many people who have been cheated on turn to themselves wondering what they could’ve done differently and wishing they could’ve prevented the infidelity. These thoughts will drive you crazy, and the first thing you need to do is change the way you look at what has happened.
You need to be comfortable accepting that you have done nothing wrong, that you’re not to blame and that you are the unfortunate victim. You may need to offload your thoughts to a friend or even to yourself by journaling in order to reframe the way you think about the whole situation.
Take Time to Heal
There’s an old saying that time heals all wounds, and you should remember this when feeling at your lowest points. It’s perfectly ok to take out from projects you’ve been working on to give yourself time to get over your ordeal.
Taking time to do things you enjoy is the best way to take your mind off things and can drastically speed up the time you need to get over things and get back to your normal self.
Start a New Hobby
Speaking of keeping yourself busy, this can be the perfect time to start a new hobby or uncover a new passion. Whether it’s trying a new sport or giving your garden some tender loving care, you’ll find that a new hobby is a great way to prevent your overthinking which can quickly lead your negative thoughts to spiral.
Treat Yourself
Don’t feel guilty for treating yourself, you deserve it after what you’ve been through! Whether it’s purchasing that new pair of shoes you’ve had your eye on or finally visiting that cosmetic surgeon in Manchester that all your friends have been recommending, there are a number of ways you can treat yourself to a mini glow-up in order to wrestle back some of that confidence you’ve lost.
Counselling
Finally, although it hopefully doesn’t get to this point, there are some fantastic counsellors who can work with you if your confidence has taken a severe hit. If you’ve tried some of the tactics above and still feel yourself battling constant negative thoughts, it may be time to talk to a professional counsellor or therapist.
Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT is a common technique used by therapists which helps people suffering from low self-esteem break their issues down into more manageable quantities. There is also medication that may help if you are suffering from severe depression or anxiety but you should always consider the side effects and consult a health professional before committing to medication.
